Wanted: Direction

I’ve been thinking recently about what direction my life should be taking. I feel like it’s time to ask that question and, although to be perfectly honest, I’m a little apprehensive about asking, I still feel the need to ask. It’s not that I’ve been living my life randomly or without direction, but I sense a change. I read this recently, although I can’t remember where:

“The spiritual life is oriented toward God, rather than toward the immediate satisfaction of the material needs of life, but it is not, for all that, a life of unreality or a life of dreams. On the contrary, without a life of the spirit, our whole existence becomes unsubstantial and illusory. The life of the spirit, by integrating us in the real order established by God, puts us in the fullest possible contact with reality—not as we imagine it, but as it really is. It does so by making us aware of our own real selves and placing them in the presence of God.”

It is that life in the spirit that compels me to ask the question about my life’s direction. I don’t want to be on the outside looking in at reality—I want to be smack dab in the middle of it!

I have a kitchen window sill full of the most perfect red tomatoes, given to me by my new neighbor, Mary. She grew them in her own garden and I look at them every day because they’re right there above the sink. I decided to take one and eat it with breakfast this morning. When I turned it over, I noticed that it was beginning to rot from sitting too long. Now, it’s not that I think my life is going to rot and turn bad like the tomato, but I did see a parable.

I think there’s a big difference between living on the edge like that tomato, and living on the edge as in a life of expectation. I also think we tend to get what we expect. If we expect bad things to happen or have the mentality that we’re never going to get a break, never going to get ahead…then that’s probably what we’re going to get. On the other hand, if we believe good things will come our way, that working hard has benefits and rewards and that life is full of adventures waiting to happen…then that’s probably what we’re going to get.

I choose to believe that life is an adventure waiting to happen and I want to be right in the middle of it!

On Deep Voices, Butts and Finding a Mate

Sometimes headlines crack me up. I’m always on the lookout for great headlines, especially if it’s a catchy one that gets my attention or a funny, misleading one like “Father Feeds Alligator with Child.” Two get the prize for making me laugh out loud this morning.

The first one was on Yahoo News and was entitled, “Deep-Voiced Men Have More Kids.” I’m the first one to admit that I’m a sucker for a deep voice, but I never thought about it being an indicator of reproduction. Yes, my deep-throated male friends out there…there apparently is a connection between men with low voice pitch and a higher reproductive success rate, including having more children born to them. This is according to new research released by McMaster University in Canada. Previous studies there have shown that women are more attracted to men with deeper voices, judging them to be older, healthier and more masculine than their higher-pitched rivals. What made me laugh was that the research was conducted by studying the Hadza tribe of Tanzania. Maybe it’s just me, but I struggle with the relevancy of comparing one of the last hunter-gatherer tribes of Africa with men in our Western culture. Perhaps this study suggests that we really don’t move too far from our evolutionary roots. The study also said this could give insight into the evolution of the human voice as well as how we choose our mates. Anyway, that’s the good news.

The bad news is that whether or not voice pitch and quality is part of the mate-choosing process, guys just seem destined to get the short end of the stick. Why? Because in a second related article, “Men Pay the Ultimate Price to Attract Women,” the jist of it is that competition among males to find a mate can kill them!

We’ve known for some time that women generally live longer than men. That’s been statistically proven for years, although in recent times the age gap between men and women has been closing because of various factors—increased stress, environmental factors that effect health, etc.

“Women live longer in almost every country, and the sex difference in lifespan has been recognized since at least the mid-18th century," said Daniel Kruger at the University of Michigan. "It isn't a recent trend; it originates from our deep evolutionary history."

Using his experience with chimpanzees, Kruger says the males start competing for females around age 13, which happens to the peak age for mortality for these frisky fellows. Gives you a whole different way to look at “monkeying” around, doesn’t it?

Think of rams butting heads. Whichever ram wins the head-butting contest, wins the right to be top stud, not to mention having the biggest headache. And don’t forget male birds that strut their bright plumage around impressing all the girls with their “Hey, chickie baby, look at me” attitude. All that finery uses energy and shortens lifespan.

The bottom line is that males exhibit more aggression and are bigger risk-takers when seeking a mate than at any other time in their lives, and this is true whether you’re a chimpanzee, a ram or just plain human.

There is a ray of sunshine in all this though, guys, and a reason to keep on laying on that deep voice, butting those proverbial heads and strutting your stuff. You get the biggest prize of all—us!

But in case you need more proof, there is the study about how men and women rank attractiveness based on smelling armpit sweat…